What it is
DEAR MAN (Describe, Express, Assert, Reinforce, Mindful, Appear confident, Negotiate) is a DBT interpersonal effectiveness skill for making requests or setting firm boundaries while maintaining relationships.
Why it works
Interpersonal conflict often escalates when requests are vague or defensive. DEAR MAN provides a clear, objective script that balances self-respect with interpersonal effectiveness:
Interactive Shift
DEAR MAN Scripting
Unhelpful Cognitive LoopMind Reading Assumption
“They should just know what I need without me having to say it directly.”
Practicing with Camic
Camic helps you draft and practice a DEAR MAN script in conversation before engaging in a challenging personal or professional discussion.
Applied in real situations
Sources
Linehan, M.M. (1993, 2014). DBT Skills Training Manual. New York: Guilford Press.